I was reading an article about this lady who had to write about something she knew a whole lot about (meditation) and when she went to start writing, she couldn’t figure out what to write.  She was frozen.  She knew all about the topic, but she couldn’t figure out how to talk about it.  Writing in this is a lot like that, so I hoped that if I just used that memory as a way of starting, I could start.

 

Mission accomplished.  Her thing was talking about how once she surrendered to the idea, the words just started flowing. So, good for her, and...well, jeez.  As I was writing this sentence, literally five words in, I get two calls from the old agent--callback and an audition coming Friday and Monday.  Cool, right?  

 

So, maybe you can identify with this, maybe not, but I always seem to be driving my actions during the day, moving forward very quickly, going from point to point, rushing along, doing my thing, blah blah blah.  But to be creative, you have to let your mind surrender all the time, which is why, perhaps, the topics for this journal come to me when I am driving, falling asleep, or taking a shower.  All places very much removed from this keyboard and monitor combination.  I am sure writers deal with this all the time, which is why they carry notebooks..same thing with artists and photographers. They realize that they need to be able to record when they realize that their mind is chillin and creatin’ and boom--they got some good ideas.

 

I have been surrendering like crazy lately, which is why I haven’t been writing.  In addition to my workout schedule, which peaked two weeks ago with me taking 9 classes in the space of 5 days (I just wanted to see if I could do it, and I can but it’s not really a good idea to do that), I am starting to take yoga twice a week.  It’s been hard, it’s been weird and it’s been really fantastic.  I won’t get all lame and yoga-ey (legitimate concerns, my friend), but suffice to say, I have been to a bunch of classes and I really like it.  It’s just nice to go from position to position and just be still and hang out in that moment for a bit.  Sure my mind races, but when it realizes that I am not able to act upon these thoughts, my brain kind of mellows a bit and hangs out with my breathing.  Very cool.  And thanks to my many nights out on the dancefloor, I am pretty good at remembering physical and mental states, so I am getting better at recreating that kind of silent balance during the day when  everything starts blowing up around me.  Again, very cool.

 

Other stuff:

 

- Time Warner Cable’s DVR totally sucks and I have sent them a few emails and they refuse to acknowledge the fact that I am writing them.  I really let them have it, I admit, but jeez, the thing crashes, it displays garbage characters and it’s slow.  And weak.  And terrible.  And lame. And embarrassing. They gotta figure this crap out and Tivo needs to wake up and rethink their business strategy.  It’s like razors, you guys--give them the box, then work with advertisers and content providers to make the money.  Jeez.

 

- Acting is going really well.  I am getting called back a lot more and am on avail for a spot, but no bookings yet.  I had a great class where I basically was doing a Saturday Night Live skit, that kind of character-y thing.  It was on camera and I was very pleased to see that not only were other people laughing, but I was chuckling as well.  Learning how not to cringe when you see yourself on TV is important, chucky.

 

okay, 4 minutes to get down to the gym, change my clothes and start the spinning class.  I am going to save and upload this now.

 

There is a lot of stuff happening.  The next few months might just blow you away.